Ho Ho Holidays ....

It's pouring cool icy teardrops ...
Echoed with sweet passionate whispers ...
I'm gladly stuck in this love struck adventure ...

Time really does fly during this break !!
Had a great holiday in Thailand ...
Although i was 100 % sick during the trip !!
It was a blast !!

Been a long long time since i worked !!
Not to mention the last time i hit the runway ...
Finally !!!
Feels so good being back on the runway since SFW !

And so NIKE it is ...
Fall 06 collection !!
The thing to look out for is their SHOES !!
AWE AWE AWESOME !!
Not to mention running shorts and singlets...

That's all for now !!
ZZZZzzzzzzz...

PHONE PHONE PHONE !!

It's coming close to half-time ...
The score is 1 - 0 ...
After tomorrow i'm gonna make it 2 - 0 ...
Tht leaves 2 more papers to kill...

Exams exams exams .. Goodness i've never felt better. THis is really so relaxing compared to Chemical Engineering. Looking forward to end this good mysery and take my long awaited sweeeeeeeeeeeeeet break. Which means heaps of sun tanning and loads of doing something very productive called "nothing".

OMG OMG OMG !! I'm so into getting a 2 Megapixels phone now ! I really want one !! Or probably me just wanting to take more photos of EVERYTHING ! Tht definitely includes myself .. HAHA .. Even better, everyone's gonna be back from overseas ! More people to catch up with.

I should cut the crap ! Gonna get some sleep desperately !

ROCKY JC

I'm 6 days and counting ..
Till me hands comes into contact with the exam papers...
Any feeling to describe ??
Feels so damn great !! HAHA ...

Nah... Just that i really hope to do the best i can for exams and it'll be breaktime for me. I still remember 1 year ago i was studying my ass off in Melbourne for my exam. It was also almost one year ago i met the first person and fell in love with. The past is the past but will be a memory remembered for life !

Anyhow, for more interesting topics, thanks for all your concerns and messages, i feel much better and recovered much from my sickness. But the weather is scary, it's so easy to crash with this sort of "happy go lucky rain" weather. Geez..Happy that my parents are finally back from the States. Was so worried over them and the freakin' terrorist thing going on now le.

But they will be leaving again le. My goodness, 2 days to rest from jetlag and flying to Korea. How to cope la seriously. Nevermind, i'm more envious than ever, cause i'm stuck here with exams while they are travelling. Even sadder, they didn't shop for me. ARGGHHH. Nevermind, i'll make the trip to Bangkok and HK myself soon.

HEHE... Record breaking day today, bought 3 perfumes !! But they were so freakin' cheap le!! My goodness... Here's the top 5 fragrances i rate highest on my list :-

1. ROCARBA by Hermes
Super masculine perfume that packs a super punch when it settles !!

2. CITY GLAM by Emporio Armani
Sleek, sheek shit !! Say it with me ..

3. BY by Dolce&Gabbana
My all time favourite ! This super eccentric mysterious fragrance.
All out attention grabber !

4. Ralph Lauren PURPLE LABLE
One hell of a catch if you can get it. Only in selected countries though.

5. Burberry BRIT
Sweet sweet baby !!


By the way, it's said that perfumes can speak someone's character !! Choose wisely therefore ! Another thing le, do visit the sequel to this blog on the side links!!!

CONSPIRACY OF A SCANDALOUS MIND 2 !! ------ >

Dying ?

I swear yesterday was almost like the worst day of my life !
I did end up in the hospital ...
I did not sleep the whole night...
Thinking i was going to leave for good ...
No words could possibly describe the emotions that were pouring through my veins that period.

It almost felt like the closest to death ...
Felt like my time was up ...
Lost all sense of hope and life ...
Felt like my chest was being constricted by a big anaconda ..
Struggling to breathe in every breath ...

I was so disorientated i didn't know what i was doing the whole night. I remember going down to the park downstairs and walking aimlessly for at least 30 minutes at 4am in the morning.Thank goodness now i'm feeling much better alive and still kicking hard. I had never felt anything like this before, although i am still feeling it now, but it was never as bad as what i felt during that whole night. I realized i was really afraid of death and i was not ready to part with so many people and things i treasured in life.

If there is anything i learned from this experience, it's really to treasure my life given to me. Life's just such a 'fragile' word that breaks any time. So live it wisely and joyously. And don't sin so much too. Haha... In the end i ended up in Mt . E early in the morning. I really need to loosen up and start relaxing more. The doctor was all ready to give me as many MC's as i needed but i realized i do not have any classes at work for the entire 2 weeks. So sadly, no MC's.

On the good note, since officially being back on the working track again the pace had picked up and favourbly to my advantage. Yesterday i got another 2 phone calls regarding 2 new castings. Which bring the total to 4 castings in 3 weeks. Pretty good for now i guess. Hoping to get more secured shoots rather than castings though. Things would definitely pick up gradually i hope. I should go back to rest now although i should be back in school.

Treasure life, as life's a treasure bestowed upon you !

Catch me if u can !?

Finally all assignments are done ...
Sigh of relief ...
For the moment that is ...
Until all hell breaks lose ..
When the killer exam comes ...

Kinda glad the assignments are over and tht's one less thing on my mind. Least now i'm just able to sit down and relax for 2 days before i bust my ass again on freakin' exam preparations . However, i did have a 'sinful trip' yesterday in town. I went for a little 'stress release' on my own and i'm rather 'satisfied' after that. Whatever your thinking it's just shopping ok.

Manage to buy singlets and shirts to add on to already a rather big collection. Sigh. Why am i always buying and buying but not wearing them so often le. Mummy and daddy left for States yesterday, will miss them and actually i'm kinda worried for them because of all the terrorist shit occuring le. So much for world peace !!!

But i did got an sms this morning ( finally ) telling me that they have arrived safely but one of their employees got held back for an hour for questioning le. Another sigh of relief !Anyhow, i'll be praying for their safety on this business trip. Everything will be fine !!

I've really got a few movies that i really wanna catch when it opens :-

1. Transporter 2 ( HOT HOT HOT )
2. Doom ( The Rock's rocks )
3. Harry Potter ( Self-explainatory)
4. Legend of Zorro ( Probably just continuation from childhood memories)


Hot upcoming news :-

I'll be getting married ... AS IF !!
HAHA .. nola .
Singapore Fashion week's coming up this month !!
Get out the that long kept sexy suit or drop-dead-gorgeuos dress and strut it with me !! Hehe ...
Till then.

Assigned Assignments ...

Kinda joyous today ...
Why ??
Finally most assignments also 7788 already ...
That's less one worry on the back of my mind ...

Felt so good today ...
No more long draining group meetings ...
Just the sweet sound of my textbooks calling me ...
Shit... Exam's just really round the corner ...
2 weeks should i time myself...

Felt satisfied today cause i cleaned the house ...
Kinda anyway ...
I get this satisfaction when i see all the dirt being removed ...
Feels damn good ... I'm insane anyway ...

Somehow or rather i'm feeling lifeless ...
Been so long since i just went out and have fun ...
Quite a while back since i last breathed in a puff of ...
Some human's smoke in the club ...
Kinda happy in a way though without partying ...
But i don't know why le ...
Probably that's the life you get ...
With all the goddamn assignments !!

Hopefully as time passes ...
Things will be back the same ...
Smiles and laughter will continue filling the house ...
And also my simple plain life .

(Intro or retro) spective??

WARNING, DEEP THOUGHTS AND WORDS BELOW. PROCEED ONLY WHEN READY.

Take your time to really slowly read it.

If you had to choose ...


Would you wanna be right or wrong ??
Most people would choose to be right...
I choose to be wrong sometimes...
That's where i am able to LEARN


Would you rather be loved or love ??
Most people would choose to be loved ...
I choose to love ...
Because i have CONTROL over loving someone


Would you rather be happy or sad ??
I hardly ever think anyone would choose to be sad ...
I will ...
Cause this is when i really THINK bout life ...
And learn to appreciate and be HAPPY !



21 years of my life passed. Yea, i'm really tht old already.
Yet how many times have i stopped the ' World'
To think about the 50 more years ahead ...
What do i wish ?
What do i dream of ?
What's the meaning of me being alive?
What do i wanna achieve ?
But most of all ...
Who am i in this population of 6 billion people on earth ??


I'm still taking time to find myself. I'll be lucky if i can do that before age 30,many people even at age 50 are still stuck finding themselves.

THINK THINK THINK !!
That's the only way you'll discover, people who never think will never achieve anything great.
How do u think Thomas Edison invented to many things.
I'm pretty sure when he was 'shitting' he's probably thinking more than us .
Haha...
Confucius, great thinker !!
Physics, if you never think and understand it , you'll never get it !
Be a great thinker !! And think positive !!


If you really wanna achieve great things in life ...
It really all starts with taking time to think !
Think bout what you want in life !
What to achieve in the next year or few years !!

When you finally figure out what you want in the next year or next few years you've found your GOAL. With this goal in your mind you'll find your FOCUS. By having this focus on the goal you'll never go astray. When you have your goals and focus, you'll find your MOTIVATION to drive you to achieve your goal.

I see so many people out there without a goal, without a goal there's no focus in life. Without focus it'll be extremely easy to get distracted and hence no aim in life and never achieving anything. That is why it's really so important to have a goal.


I remember when i told myself i wanted to be a model at the age of 17, i was 78 kg. Which is of cause fatter than your average kids la. I had that goal in mind to be a model, that drove me to lose 16 kg's in 3 months.
And for the next 3 years i worked hard to built up a good built even up to today still working so hard at the gym and watching my diet. Finally i'm happy to be where i am and achieving the goal i set for myself.

What's next ?? Or should i say what's my next goal ??
Probably getting married ... HAHAHA


Ok. After reading please do take time to THINK bout what i said . Even though it might sounds like rubbish still do THINK !!

*The word 'THINK' was mentioned 16 times ... Wow *

sigh

Another sigh entry...

Today i feel so devastated le...
Didn't feel like talking at all ...
I'm suddenly sucked into another phobia ...
Fear of arguments again...

I'm so afraid to even talk again le. I feel so much happier being all by myself and not saying anything. Don't wanna be hurt anymore le. I feel like i'm the cause of troubles. Suddenly i feel so distant and weird being at home. I'm so worried also that my friend would be angry with me cause i did not stood by him.

Feel so trapped in a dilemma. All i can do is stay silent. I feel like shit le. WEnt out wondering aimlessly in the shopping mall just to escape. Have i really developed a phobia ? I really hate arguments ... Also hate being trapped in between 2 parties ending up feeling so so bad. I just so hope this phase would pass by quickly. Please don't argue with me anymore ya. I'll really break down soon.

I just want to be happy again. Sigh ...

How high is high ?

Finally after trying to attempt my assignment i have my personal time to blog again at 2am in the morning.

The weekend was rather hectic. It was town day by day. It's routine life during the week VS the high context life during the weekend.Well, how we wanna live our life is really up to us to decide. It's just how WELL you can live it i guess.

Spent the whole saturday with my family. Mummy and Kor Kor both got new phones. I was offered by my mum any phone i wanted to get. But there was a stipulation, she would be taking my Nokia 6020. I was reluctant le. Held back for some reasons and so i didn't get a new phone. Guess sometimes money can't never buy and replace the value certain things.

Was really good we had such a good lunch together. I ate so so so much. Guess it defeats my whole week of work out. I'm really so looking forward to working. Even though it's not even coming to a month of my 2 months working break, i really need to fill up the time sometimes and as well my pocket. Hehe ...

I wanted to buy this A/X belt that i really like so much which cost just a little over 100 bucks. Went to the atm and realized i only had 98 dollars left. Kor wanted to pay for me first but in the end i thought ' Do i really need it ? Sigh, save the money le.. ' Didn't get it le. Still, have to pay up so much stuff's. Trying to keep up the good effort of not asking money from my parents. So i guess it's time to continue working.

But if i do start working and things get busy.. Will i be able to spent time with peoples who mean a lot to me. Time's passing so quickly. It's either you keep up or fall short.

Worn

Tired perhaps ...
Physically or mentally ??

Living a routine life...
How routine is routine le ??

I'm quite shagged from working out. Wanna work soon so i can earn some money.
Feels so lifeless when you can't even do the things u wanna do.
Have fun ... Eat anything and everything...

Sigh. Been such a long time since i even ate the carrot cake in clementi. Everytime i rush there to buy it's closed. Sigh ...

Shag shag shag

If i had ...

Been a while since i last blogged...
Many things happened during this period...

Should i say new life ??
Or perhaps just the same life in a different environment...
Interaction with new diff. people ...

Finally settling down back to my routine ...
Starting to enjoy studying life again ...
Things are so different compared to last time ...
Lifestyle , people , environment ...

Maybe with these changes in lifestyle and environment...
I would also change ...
Hopefully for the better ...

Well, least now not so much of wandering around in town spending money. Got a gym membership. Gonna put in more effort into working out and living a healthy lifestyle i guess. No more super late nights partying. Will sure miss it though. haha...

Hmm.. things get boring though. On a 2 months working break. No jobs, no income. Plenty of free time to spend by myself. Sometimes it's still hard to sleep at night. Adapting to this new environment.

So much time back on my hands i can really spent more time blogging away. I know that it's been quite a while. Hehe...

Gonna live my life to the fullest !

Homme Designato !!

Feeling old ??
Feeling bored in your house ??
Feeling like hating your neighbours ??
Toilet not working well ??

Great !! Let's move out !! Hahaha ...

Ignore my bullshit anyway . Anyhow, i just got my hands on these new photos from daddy. I had a foot in designing this new house with them. Finally, i get to move to a new place !! Yay !! The feeling of a new home !

But it's rather too big le . 3 and 1/2 storeys with 14 rooms i think. Only me, kor kor, daddy and mummy though, no one to fill the space le. Well, least my dogs got a lot of space to move about. Haha ... just this excitement i guess for our family. Something new to look forward to ...

I shall work harder, maybe got free time go help lay bricks and cement too ...
Hehe...

Oh yea, i'm also created 2 new blogs ...
Let me know if you want the links ...

New House 3 

New house 2 

New House 1 

Club 21 !!

Of average and legal age !!
Age to overrule my parents ( I wish )
Age to apply my own credit cards ( YES !! )
Age to love ...
And be loved ...

21 21 21 !! Sounds big aint it ? Everyone seems to be curious how i lasted on this day !!
Well well.... the stories go ..

Unfortunately, i celebrated today mostly all by myself. My parents are outstation !! Neither was my brother !! So i took the liberty of waking up early cause i slept at like 10 pm yesterday. Was so stoned i took the car out for a spin and eventually bought breakfast ...

Nope !! No friends to meet but thanks heaps for the wonderful smses and calls pouring in throughout the day !
Hmm... went for a tan , and amazingly i pulled off a 5 km run without any intervals !! Probably thanks to the fats motivating me !! Haha ...
Thankfully, my parents manage to rush back and arrived at 6pm. Dinner was amazing i would say !! Thanks mum and dad !! Love ya !! Thanks for paying the bill too ... HEHE !!

That was the end of my day !! So much for the big 21st huh !!
I'm just a simple guy you know !!
Simple guy with a complicated scandalous lifestyle !!


Oh yea...Happy 1st Birthday bloggy !!

The walk of 20 ....

This would be my last moments i guess before i turn 21 tomorrow ....


I still remember, i created my blog on June 5th 2004. So tomorrow my blog would be 1 year old. Still remember the blog frenzy then, i wanted something to pen down my feelings, thoughts and life. Hoping someday i'll return after a few years and read thru it ....

Memories are for the past , live for the now !!

I really really wanted to blog today. Even as i left Singapore my heart was so so heavy. Never felt like that in such a long time. I was comtemplating .. but i still left.
I wish and i really wished i could stay and celebrate my birthday in Singapore. But i know on that day, i would miss someone badly. So i rather leave . How i long i could spend my birthday with that person.
But i rather it be a dream.....

Now, i'm all alone. My parents are not around to celebrate with me. My brother perhaps. 21st le, suppose to be big celebrations all night long. But i guess this would be the best time for me to reflect on my 21 years of life. The life given to me. The life i had and would soon to be ....

Still reflecting on my decision to return for good. Imagine i would have so make so many more major decisions from now onwards. And FINALLY i get to apply my own CREDIT CARDS !! YES !! But something this year that has changed my life...

I allowed love to creep in. Into my life after so many years...
And it changed me. Changed me to become someone better. Someone stronger.
Changed me to be a person ...
That would not only know how to be nice to people...
But learn to love people...
The fine line between being nice and being loving.

I had fun yesterday !! Though most of my friends are all back in Melbourne. I still really enjoyed and appreciate the friends back in Singapore. Tht's why i always creep back whenever i can. Didn't get high nor drunk anyway. Hehe ...

Sigh ... i feel so ...........

Lifestyle of the rich and famous !!

Today was fun !!!

I went out with a local artiste and another model. Shall not name them ba . Anyway, does it matter ?? Cause they are my friends and that's all that matters ...

I underdressed today ! My mum never allows me to wear singlet out ! So i didn't !!
I just went out , met my friends and bought a full new set of clothes comprising a singlet , pants and sneakers . My goodness, first time walking around in public in a singlet !! Nevertheless, the attention received was overwhelming !! Love the entire look . Thanks Jo and Dan for picking the look for me . Haha !! The funny thing is , before i left i actually changed back to my old clothes rather than tht singlet.

Spent basically the whole day walking round town or should i say parading !! HAHA!!
Even manage to sit down and have a chat with Winnie Loo. She's really something man !!
Celebrity hair stylist and owner of A Cut Above !!
Becoming like the David Gan of Malaysia.

Well, i enjoyed today but it's taking it's toll now !! I feel so shagged !!

However, i got shit from mum ! And i am really sorry mum . Sorry le i overspent by so much. I should not waste money like that. Spent least 10 k in the last 3 months. Sigh !!
Stupid boy !! Useless !! Stop being a brat !!

I'm zoned out !! Cyaz .
Singapore tomorrow !!

PHoto mania !!

Bloggy bloggy ...
I have abandoned you ...

Haha... sorry for the recent photo frenzy ..
Let's start !!
Work's pilling up slowly but gradually !! YAY !!
It's a good thing considering my parents and brother work so so hard ..
I need to make myself look more hardworking ...
Daddy left to Perth today..
I hope he'll have a good time
Haha..

Omg !! The past 3 days been running 2.4 k everyday ! It's crazy man but sigh. No choice bah... been working out so much just to get in shape for all the $$$$ to come.

Sun's been good to me !! Had my third tanning session and i swear !! For all the baking it's definitely worth it ! Confidence up up up !!

Sadly, not able to hang out with my friends back in Singapore !! Darn !!

Countdown : 5 days till my deardear gets back !!
Countdown : 15 days to my birthday !!

I'll be turning 21 real soon !! Hence hoping my 4 figure pay will come in soon !!
Just in time for ' SINGAPORE SALES '.....
So gonna be broke !
Ciaoz ..

P-staR 

Alvi = LV 

Ericazzzzzzzz 

My roomate Sam 

Lofters 

1505 

Crazy/Beautiful 

Home Sweet home !! SOb Sob !!

Touchdown ...

I'm home le . It's a very mixed feeling. And also the most awkward one especially with my parents. Sigh.

05/05/05
The day i left Australia for good. A date i will always remember. A day i said good bye to many people. It's so sad man, u guys made me teared at te airport. Good thing i left in time before it overflowed. Thank God.
Another reason why i won't forget the day i left Australia. I got upgraded !!!! From Business to First Class !! OMG !! Never ever sat First Class before. I was SO swimming in the space which made me really feel like i was on a king's throne.
Thanks so much for the letters and also cards. Will keep it dear to me ! And not to mention the t-shirt !! You guys are the best la .

Been pouring the whole day. Wanted badly to get my tan but looks like i won't make it. Missing someone so badly le.
Oh !!! I got myself an Ipod Shuffle !! Hook me up !!



Always fight for the things you want and never say 'i give up'
JC

1 more day !!

1 more day ....

Yesterday, was painful. I became emotionless. Why does the truth hurt so bad. Now i only wish to come back now. To a fresh new start. To a second chance to work things out again. I really really hope things would work out for the better.

Thank you, for your courage to tell me. You would know who you are. I respect and thank you for that.

Finally after more than 36 hours without sleep i got my 'rest' . Woke up feeling so much more alive today. Busy, busy busy.

I got my tan today, goodness it's good !! The tanlines makes me feel hot !!! Haha ...
Working out so much the past few weeks and everything seems well. I'm so prepared to come back now !! Fashion week, back to work and climb back to where i was before.

Hate the laptop, so hard to blog ...



Always fight for what you want and never say ' i give up ' !
JC

Kavana - Will you wait for me

My 4th Farewell ...

If you guys ever get the chance. Get the song looping in my blog now. It's ' Will you wait for me ' by Kavana.

I've posted so many photos, it' almost like a photo frenzy ! Today, i had a surprise farewell by the ACCFers. Sigh , took so may photos for memories, but the true memories lies in my heart. Whenever i think of the things that we have done. It just emits a smile on my face and in my heart.

Every farewell which i attend my heart just sinks. It's painful ! Because i know i'm gonna leave and i'm really gonna miss this people. And the 'moments' we had together. Each group of people so individually different. All connected together.

I think the last farewell will be at the airport. I don't know if i can hold back my tears. I wish i can and i want to !! I don't want to cry in fromt of anyone !! 4 days and counting ...


Always fight for what you want and never say ' i give up' !
JC

What more could you ask for ?! 

Mark my best friend in Melbourne! 

Pris&Mark @ Seoul House 

Group @ Seoul House 

Arggghhhh !!!

Goodness me,

I'm so drained and tired. Just finished my second farewell lunch and man i am so damn tired. I had less than 3 hours sleep. Let me see, clubbing in Next Blue till 3 plus in the morning . OMG !! It has been so long since i have been there, the crowd has left tht place and now it's so much more quiet. Not that it matters cause i had my friends and not forgetting !! ALCOHOL !! to heat things up and we had loads and loads of fun ! Happy 21st Jill !!


Shag man, talked for a while and packed a little and ended up in bed by 6.30am. Had to wake up at 10 am for oldz skoolz farewell lunch. I was so stoned !! And it wasn't even a hang over, probably lack of sleep. Today my 'wonder mattress' is going to leave me. Sigh, the 'place' where i spent half my time hibernating on in Australia is being sold away. Guess i'll just have to make it without a bed for now.


OK ! I'm so damn tired now, clubbing tonight again !! Double shag !! How would i even make it through !! So gonna kill my complexion !! Not to mention the 3rd model farewell tomorrow arvo ! Someone spare me some sleeping pills ?? Hahaha... tht's all for now, back to packing and more packing !!

Ricky @ Next Blue 

Happy 21st Jill !! 

THANK YOU

I'm speechless ...
Stuck emotionless...
I'll just wait...
Wait for you to come back...


This soundtrack belongs to one to the movie shows, Infernal affairs. They play it whenever something sad or touching occurs.

One more week, i'm leaving. Guy's and girls, thanks for being a part of my life. Thanks for your phone calls and smses and to some i'm sorry you had to find out that way. Sorry i didn't make it an effort to tell you guys myself.
Sorry.

I thought i would be so happy leaving Melbourne, cause finally i can go where my heart is somewhere far away from Melbourne. However, as time passes, i realize no matter how much i try, i'll still never forget some of you guys here. People who have left me memories.

Memories that will live in me, deep down, trully .......... Thank you.

I will miss all of you. All of you.




Always fight for the things you want, and never say "i give up"
JC

Count me down !

Alrighty,

It's officially 2 weeks before my sorry ass lands get's kicked out of Australia and gets checked backed home. Shit... i should have made that sound nicer.

But yes 2 weeks to get packed. Not only my physical baggages, but also my emotional attachments. Leaving a place i would say have never been this joyous and in a way sad. Sigh...... such a mix feeling. For some, i'm glad our paths did crossed but somehow or rather this is the end where for some of them i would have to say good bye forever.

I remember someone telling me this , " You've made such an impact and memory in many people's life ". Sigh, i really don't know how to carry on writting this.....

Life now .... Live now ...

Any words to describe now would be :-

1. Bored
2. Broke
3. Busted

I'm stuck at home mostly doing nothing at all daily. It's probably just rotting at home as a daily routine. It's not that i don't wanna occupy myself with something interesting but just that Melbourne's this boring. But i should start packing or arranging my stuffs.Even my favourite pass time shopping's taken off the list. Which leads me back to the 2nd point.

Broke. Oh goodness, nothing can get worst than that. My expenditure has sky rocketed since i got back. Not even been anywhere close to shopping but just due to some reasons my money's all being drained up rather quickly. Wow, stressful le. The past 3 days i've been cooking meals. But i'm so fed up because i don't wanna keep cooking the same stuff. No choice le, if that's what would keep me saving, YES .... I'll do it willingly considering now i have not even a dollar cash to spend. Sigh.

Well, i'm being busted for the recent major decision. Won't wanna blog it out here cause i just can't be bothered but yes. Sad life le. My goodness, things just keep getting more interesting for my situation. Someone spare me a gun will ya ?????

Haha... Kidding nia. But only the gun part. For the rest, reality sinks in.

What's up with D&G models man ...  

Glamorous lifestyle . 

Hook me up !!! This Gucci suit rocks .

FIGHTer

My time's slowly running up ....
Waking up everyday after a late night ...
I feel like i'm a pawn in the chest game ...
Waiting for the next move ...
That could either make me or kill me ...
Finally ....

Another chapter of my life have closed ...
My friends that stood and crossed my path ...
I will trully miss you guys ...
For you have shaped me to become the person i am ..
Each individual one of you so special ...

Hands wide open ...
Embracing the new chapter that awaits me ..
My future, my life , my destiny ...
Big words that still scares me when i think of it ...
But i know in the end ...
I'll make it ...

New dreams and goals ...
New exciting environment ...
New faces and friends yet to meet ...
Something i'll be looking forward towards ...
Better get ready...
Coming your way ...

It's finally bye bye Melbourne ...
Welcome to the big new world ...........

I love this photo 

Guess it for yourself ! 

Frankfurt Airport 

Beautiful day 

Sigh

Left standing alone all by myself. If it's not possible for us to be together why are we still trying so hard to fight against the odds. Why is it that sometimes that there's this feeling in me to fight to the very end. And in the very end that i lose.....

Most of you who know me would know me as a very very strong character and personality. But eventually i'm still human and there's only that much i can do. I strive so hard to make everything come true but everything somehow just seems like it's not working.

But even still, as though it seems like a losing battle that things will not turn for the good where everything just seems so clouded and dark. I could only hang on by the thread. By believeing, believeing that there's still little hope. Even with that little hope i'll still pull myself up and fight, fight to survive, fight for what i have dreamed of....

2005

Tonight I BLOG !!!



It has been ages since i last posted. It's good to be back blogging !! Not Melbourne. Well, 3 months swept past and i'm still laid back trying to accept the fact tht Uni's started. Sigh !! This year even more significant marked by the day June 5th where i officially am integrated into adulthood. 21 years old.

Looking back from the teenage life. Somehow or rather it still seemed more like a childlike life fully dependent on my parents until i left for Australia. I dare say, i've came a long way. From school to college into uni life. The transition was a rather swift change but part of the memories still remains. From a 78kg to 60 kg to 70 kg within the period of 3 years. Wow, looking back at it i still wonder how i did it and how amazing an experience it was. From a chubby boy to a slim model moving into an artist is still something i can hardly grasp and understand.

However, i'm happy and grateful for i have succeeded my dream and goal. To be the person i want to be. Most of all. To be HAPPY. But if i ask myself, am i trully happy? It's a question i'm still puzzled with and cannot answer. But for now it'll do.

2005. A new year with new motive and a new dream and goal to set and achieve. What am i going to set for this year and the years to come. The even bigger question !!! How many years am i going to take to achieve it. How much hard work. Still so many things to figure out !! But i know i'll definitely be able to do it.

Sigh ... back to Melbourne again. 4th year. I really miss someone. I just want to say i really miss you a lot. And finally also thank you for what we shared together. Thanks .... If u ask me now. I'm trully Happy.